I was so tired last night, two sick sons, an injured husband, I had seen ninety patients over the previous two days, led two bible studies and a local fellowship group. I poured myself onto the sofa at ten thirty, after all the chores, emails, texts and phone calls and stared at my picture.
I have two paintings on my walls and a bunch of random photos of my family. The first picture is by Declan S, it is his interpretation of God’s view of creation, he used light & colour and brushstrokes to create a sphere bursting in from nothing. It is a powerful meditation tool that I have used for a few years now.
The second picture, “Lost in Worship,” by some person used shape and colour to build a picture that can be touched, the waterfall of Spirit, falling afresh. It danced in central vision. The colours bounced in and out of focus and I chilled out and prayed for an extended time.
Much later as I was getting ready to retire for the night, I realised I had forgotten to do the daily ritual of cup looking. The cup sat looking at me, instead. Reproach. A few years ago I would have stopped and done the cup looking ritual because I had promised to do this thing each day. But that was years ago, now in a new freedom I don’t follow the rules in ritualistic fashion, so I left the cup on its table and went to bed.
I awoke this morning, I wish I could say refreshed and ready for the day, but the last few days have been too busy, too distracting and I therefore woke with a banging headache, heavy eyes and a leaden body. I sat drinking my tea when the cup caught my eye. Yes, I will cup look now. Now is exactly the right time to peer into the cup:
The introduction was on the nose, it talked about doing rituals because it was the appointed time and getting into the busyness of spirituality rather than the being. I have learned to let go of the rules of time & space, I am free and when I imagine my soul it is dancing through a meadow of poppies with arms high in abandonment – complete surrender. My inner being is completely surrendered to the Lord, there are no obstacles between me and the living God I worship.
Creating space, to allow the presence of God to be felt, to allow the loving energy flow through me, to my fingertips as I write this, no ritual, just hessed flowing in and flowing out.
What an amazing God I have, a God who loves so much, A God who dwells with me, a God who is interested in every part of my life, a God who is in the details of my daily chores, helping me fend off temptation, helping me fend off the devil. O Lord thank you for every blessing this day, for the eyes, heavy earlier, now fully alert to your prompting, for the body, leaden an hour ago, now full of your loving energy, ready to engage, for my head, that was aching a short time ago, now bouncing with ideas and focused on you alone. Thank you Lord for all you do in my life and others, Amen